Today I’d like to talk about the fact that we often know what we don’t want in life but we rarely formulate it in a way that says what we want. And also about the negativity – the negative talk that we say to ourselves, in our head or out loud.

We need to turn it around because your subconscious mind is listening.

Watch the video (with captions) to find out how or read on:

(with captions)

These are some examples that I have from clients. When they fill out the application form to start working with me, I ask them:

“What do you want to change?”


“How would you like to be?”

Failure to Success

The first example is from a guy who wants more confidence in his business. He says the thing he’d like to do is to “trust himself not to fail.”

Now that is packed in negativity. He thinks it’s positive, that’s how he would like to be: trusting himself not to fail.

I pointed out to him in a very friendly way that that is a negative outcome.

Your subconscious mind is listening and which word does it hone in on?


Trusting myself not to FAIL.

Ding, ding, ding! The alarm bells go off and your subconscious mind says, “Okay, fail? Do you want to fail? Alright, we’ll carry on doing the same as you’ve got right now.”

He reformulated it to: “Trusting myself to succeed and to be successful.” Much better!

Second-Guessing to Trusting

Another person said that she wants to stop second-guessing herself. Which word does your subconscious mind hone in on?


“Okay, we’ll carry on second-guessing yourself!” She’ll get more of what she’s asking for.

We reformulated it to “trusting her decisions.” She wants to trust her decisions and instincts more to get what she wants.

Procrastination to Action

Another person wrote, “I would love to stop procrastinating.”

Okay, her subconscious mind says, “Ah! Procrastination? Do you want more of that? Right you are, here you go!” And it carries on the pattern that you had previously.

You need to change it around to make what you want positive. So the positive suggestion could be, “I want to take more action. I want to do the work. I want to get out there and be present every day.” Whatever suits you. Turn it around so that your goal is positive and your subconscious mind will help you to achieve that.

Anxiety to Confident and Calm

Another one: “I’d like to not feel anxious about social events.” Which word does the subconscious mind hone in on?


“I’ll give you more of that, that’s no problem!” And you continue the pattern.

We turned that around. These are the exact words that she wanted to be after she realised that she’d formulated her goal negatively: “I want to feel confident, calm and happy in my own skin.” And she is very, very happy now about social situations and presenting herself. She’s doing regular videos and films and absolutely loving it.

Questioning Everything to Trusting

Another person wrote, “I’d like to be happier and NOT QUESTION EVERYTHING I SAY OR DO.”

“Okay”, says her subconscious mind, “you want to question everything you say and do? We’ll carry on giving you the same of what you’ve asked for.”

So we turned that around to say, “I want to be happy with what I say and do. I want to trust in everything that I say and do.”

Recognising the Pattern

These are patterns that you need to first become aware of and then you can change them to something more positive. Mostly, people are not aware of the negative pattern and when I point it out, they realise and modify. It takes a bit of practice and you soon get the hang of it.

That’s part of how hypnosis works – we turn negative statements around. And we ask ourselves, what is the outcome that I want? Not what I don’t want. Your subconscious mind will help you to achieve that.

You have it all inside of you

Your subconscious mind is not some kind of external thing “out there”. It’s not voodoo magic that I give you in hypnosis, it’s something that you have inside of you. You haven’t quite learnt how to activate it and use it to your advantage. Hypnosis can help you to do that, turn things around and utilise your subconscious mind.

I’ve had great results with my clients in improving their confidence and their self-belief, their self-esteem and achieving their goals.

How Can I Help You?

If you would like some deep, subconscious help in turning around your negative patterns into positive ones, book a chat here and let’s talk.

Thank you and see you again soon!

All the best,